Decalogue Lessons

There is a great thing in the Bible as in the Torah, ie the Decalogue. They also say the ten commandments, especially in Hollywood. The version of the Jewish tradition also given by the Vatican is the following, according to Wikipedia:

First Commandment: I am the Lord your God who brought thee out of Egypt.
Second Commandment: Thou shalt have no other God but me.
Third Commandment: Thou shalt not take the name of God in vain.
Fourth Commandment: Remember the Sabbath day.
Fifth Commandment: Honor thy father and thy mother.
Sixth Commandment: Thou shalt not kill.
Seventh Commandment: Thou shalt not commit adultery.
Eighth Commandment: Thou shalt not steal.
Ninth Commandment: Thou shalt not bear false witness.
Tenth Commandment: Thou shalt covet neither the woman nor the house, or nothing that belongs to your neighbor.

Yeah, it’s kitsch at will, and how inspiring to me! 

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Casually, the Decalogue has something to hide. Critical revision. For any crazy descrambler, it’s a piece of king. Turn the myth deciphering machine on! No sooner said than done. Here is the Decalogue in its original version, the one that was carefully censored by priests and rabbis.

I am the Lord your God who brought thee out of Egypt. I say this because you must be grateful to me. More than that!

Thou shalt have no other God but me. This proves that there are others, you might say. Of course there are others, you moron! Many many others. Open your eyes.

Thou shalt not take the name of God in vain. I gave you the magic mantra that can contact me at any time of day or night, even on weekends. Not abused. If you disturb me indiscriminately, it will file for your race.

Remember the sabbath day. One day a week you will not foutras one, to my good health. Gift ! You see, I can be cool when I want.

Honor your father and your mother. If you treat them like dogs, one day it’s me you treat her as a poor shit. And that sucks.

Thou shalt not kill, because killing is the prerogative of the gods. I have the right, I do what I want, I am god. Not you. Serves you right!

Thou shalt not commit adultery. Because the bawdy somersault is another prerogative of gods. We can. Thou shall tell you of your chaps. Is not messing around.

Thou shalt not steal. My system is based on private property, damn it! I have a holy horror of collectivism. Bolshevism and when he shouts “Property is theft!” Of course, this bullshit! But it is not said. Criticizing you leaders will eventually lead to criticize your god. Or worse, to a change. And it sucks too.

Thou shalt not bear false witness. I have the right to lie to you, it’s for your own good, who are you to judge the divine plan? Do not forget who you’re talking to, asshole.

Thou shalt not covet neither the woman nor the house, or anything that belongs to your neighbor. You will be good and nice, behave, keep calm, even if I or a great of this world just stick to you your wife, your house and all your property, we were right, it is even a duty, but you have to shut up your face and bless the day you were born within my own people who belong to me myself I. Because I am jealous, I will not tolerate any deviation. And I’m stingy moreover. Do not expect to receive donations in shambles, I have other fish to fry, moreover you do not deserve any. Work hard, do you remember, give thanks, humble thyself, down, bent down your head, ramp, again, rub well your belly in pig shit, you infidel dog.

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Well, I take me, but that’s the idea. Throw Decalogue to the dogs. Or rather not. This text should be taught to children, to show them clearly the cunning of the terraformer gods and the futility of all religions. Children can recognize the truth, especially toddlers. It speaks to their hearts. The truth is so simple that even children can understand.

 

Each life is a fairy tale written by the hand of God.
Hans Christian Andersen