The Dragon Of Ego


Some time ago, I published an article about the ego, and how this protective mechanism becomes, over the course of internal evolution, an insurmountable block. A reader told me about his difficulties on this subject, asking me how I had done to solve the problem. Sorry to disappoint him, I couldn’t. I just refrained it.


The problem of the ego

It seams impossible to definitively solve the problem of the ego. This is not given to humans, I am afraid. In other times, Jean-Claude Flornoy opened the doors of the other world. I owe him this second life that took root in the first, the one my parents gave me. My benefactor has found a lot of precious things, a wealth of know-how buried in the mists of time. He passed them on to some of the astral explorers I had the chance to be part of.

I had already explored the world in search of myself, during my youth. To seek oneself entails a great risk, that of reinforcing one’s ego. Without ego, the human being can not live. With a powerful ego, the human being can not divinize himself. The ego, say the Lamaists, is the only part of ourselves that cannot experience enlightenment.

The nagual Flornoy told me often, he did well. A dominant ego is useful in the material world, it becomes a major handicap in the spiritual world. C. G. Jung agreed:

The first half of life is devoted to forming a healthy ego, the second half is going inward and letting go of it. (Carl Gustav Jung)


The Middle Way

If one can not get rid of the ego, and the ego is opposed to enlightenment, then it is impossible to awaken. Yet enlightenment exists. How to reconcile these two truths? Here again, the middle way is the solution. I can not kill my ego, otherwise I die. but I can keep it within limits that do not prevent awakening.

Jean-Claude liked to tell the story of the two Christian saints who fought the dragon of the ego. This is Saint George and Saint Michael. Saint Michael is the only one to have defeated the dragon. But Saint Michael is not a man, he is an archangel. As such, he can live very well without ego. Angels are carried by the Self. Eternal, infinite, total, the Self is confused with enlightenment. Some have met him in astral, they call him the being of light. I say it’s our soul.

What about Saint George, did he not defeat the dragon? Yet he was human. Small precision: George did not slay the dragon, he wounded and then put to flight. Big difference!

As long as the master is absent, the foreman is in command. As soon as the master arrives, the foreman must give him room. As long as the eternal soul is not incarnate, the ego holds the upper hand. For the soul to incarnate, it is necessary and sufficient that the ego be discreet.


Awakening killer

Necessary parenthesis: when I talk about the ego dragon, what dragon is it? The metaphorical dragon, or a real dragon? The archon dragon, our master? The one who reigned over humans, and still reigns — isn’t Mammon the archon the first god that humans worship?

The Serpent People and the dragon gods have ruled our planet since the dinosaurs, of which they are the ultimate and most powerful emanation. The archons were there long before little Adam came. They are the origin of this humanity, which they co-created. The geneticist god Prometheus/Enki had achieved a human so perfect that the Goddess gave him a soul. This immortal soul that the Archons are deprived of.

They are very jealous of our supra-consciousness(1), and because they cannot acquire it, they try by all means to prevent us from using it. And they succeed! Thus a majority of humans remain riveted to the material plane, the field of election of the Archons. All these humans worship Mammon while they sacrifice to the cult of the ego, mode of operation of the Archontic people.

(1)Supra-consciousness is more appropriate than supra-mental to express this ability of humans to go up and up till they reach the top of themselves. Our noblest task is to use this power which protect us of archons and their heavy tricks. If you want to be indemn and free, be conscient, get rid of mental, try controlled madness.

The ego is an awakening killer dragon. Ego is the weapon, while the cult of matter, of wealth, of material power are their oh so effective ammunition. And lethal: out of enlightenment, no salvation. You remain animal and you’ll die dying.



The little mysteries

To put him to flight is an effective tactic, knowing that he will come back sooner or later. The ego always comes back, accustomed as it is to direct, persuaded that it is without him, it is the death without sentence. For the ego, entering the white light of enlightenment is a way of dying. The ego knows that at the end of the path of enlightenment, the being will merge with the universal consciousness, and he, the ego, will return to nothingness. As long as we act in the material world, the ego is our shield. As soon as we give up the material to turn towards the light, the ego brakes us.

The best way to contain the excesses of the ego is to break the mirror of self-contemplation. Erase my personal story. First there was the great spring cleaning: the arcana XIII, the initiation to the little mysteries. My benefactor Jean-Claude Flornoy plunged me into the abyss in search of my engrams, these emotional blockages that limit evolution and perpetuate sufficiency.

Nowadays, this cleaning is done by itself. Disadvantage: the recollection of engrams does not necessarily intervene. The subject recovers the energy that his engrams blocked, but is not aware of the mistakes he committed and the attacks he was victim. This major disadvantage implies a voluntary and active memory work, for those who wish completeness and realization.


Compagnon passant

After that, I became the initiator after being the initiate. For about fifteen years, I was a passing companion. I made thirty people pass through the throes of the arcanum XIII. As their engrams faded, burned by the fire of catharsis, I took the opportunity to clean yet more personal engrams that had not been dislodged by my own catharsis.

And following Flornoy, I became maître passant du Devoir, in the first and true sense of the term. Piece of luck ? Perfectionism? These many cleanings have exhausted me, many times I thought my last hour came, but, said Nietzsche, what does not kill us makes us stronger. I survived. I no longer deal with the catharsis of Arcanum XIII, where my role has become superfluous. My new work, how exhilarating, is to pass for the great mysteries of Isis, and to open to future initiates the door of awakening.



Fire the trinkets!

But the work on the ego is not over. An unrepentant collector, I had amassed trinkets, traces, tricks, trifles, bits of nothing and various oddities, as did the Knight de la Ficelle in his rag bag. The flames helped me clean it all.

Twice, my house burned. A forgotten fryer set fire to my kitchen. Later, in another house, a failing stove burned my living room and my bedroom.

Everything has been destroyed of my memories as well as a good part of my own little story. Yet, in my head, there was still too much to live here and now. So I started telling myself in this site. I had trouble talking about me, I still have, the exercise is not easy. Braving my reluctance, exceeding modesty, stalking bragging, I got stuck. I have not finished. Telling one’s personal story is a good way to get rid of it.


After the ‘me’, comes the Self

After the great cleansing by the flames, the inner fire is lit. When the ego fades, comes the self. The self which is in us communicates with the universal Self.

This is another name given to the immortal soul. Another name given to God. Awakening is the world of the Self. Another world, believe me.

I discovered one by one the different degrees of awakening, whose ascent continues. But awakening is not a degree, nor a diploma, nor a license, nor even a status acquired once and for all.



Awakening is a grace that we receive and that the Self take back. The awakening lasts for a time, it illuminates the whole being to its smallest fibrils. It makes you shine, it draws on your lips the smile of the angel of Reims.above


Rude is the fall

Then the awakening goes back where it belongs. We stay naked. Disappointed. Cheated … It comes back, and then goes again. That’s it. Extreme cyclothymia from the edge of the world to the heart of a sky, too many skies above. Temptation of the after, of the elsewhere.

And then eternity on the spot, hic et nunc, fulfilling enjoyment at the edge of emptiness. One day perhaps the state of awakening becomes permanent, but this victory is not mine. I wish it to become one.

I remember this word from a Tibetan lama. For him, enlightenment is acquired once and for all. That’s not what I’ve experienced, nor what I can see. It would be too simple. There are ups and downs, it’s inevitable.

With all due respect to this Rimpoche,Most Precious, title given to awakened lamas we are not in a perfect world. There are always adjustments to be made, revisions, corrections. Even if they are minimal, they must be made in order for progress to continue.

The awakened thus finds himself doing the yoyo between the first degree of awakening and the preceding arcanum, namely XV The Devil. He’s not a bad devil, all his chakras stay open, but the fontanel closes a little. Technically, you’re awake. Practically, we’re still asleep.

Then begins the merciless battle of The Moon of the tarot, the arcanum XVIII. This arcanum is the reception of the psi powers. As always, these conquests begin from below. We must go down to hell to know our roots in order to clean them. The magic that comes to us is first black magic. There is only one magic, it comes from the lower astral, it is taught to us by the Archons. If we remain in their orb, we will be black sorcerers. If we cause the transfiguration, we will be white mage.


The upper arcana

At every step, we have this choice: to grow or shrink. This is a real dilemma that pushes us to our limits. Who does not move forward, back away. It’s impossible to stay there. Everything moves around us, everything changes, so do we. The illusion of continuity is always a loss of speed. Whatever the level reached, a relapse is possible, we remain under the threat of a return of ego. And the higher we are, the harder the fall. I knew one awakened by lightning who, later on, really took himself for God. The unfortunate died of a massive heart attack. The heart was his weak point…

And patiently, peacefully, I climbed one by one the degrees of awakening according to the higher arcana, as described by Flornoy. Again, he had seen right, he who did not say he saw. The Star, the realization of a work useful to the living, you guessed it, it is the site you read. I have passed this level, but I will only stop writing with death.

The Moon, I just said, is the dark work of alchemy. A difficult step, but it bears beautiful fruit. The Sun then shone, with what happiness I abandoned myself there. With the help of the astral twin, the powers are present, the road is easy, beautiful daily encounters. But the best things come to an end, and the adventure continues.

The Judgment sounds in his trumpet, and I come out of the tomb, risen but still more dead than alive. I judged myself and condemned myself, I suffered the death penalty, it is the second initiatory death after that of the arcane XIII, already distant.

After the resurrection, I open my arms wide to the World. I am no longer there, but I see it spreading at my feet, and I love it. For now, I am there, I will not go further.



The being and the ego

The reader will have understood the extreme difficulty of the relations between being and ego. The latter represents the control that the Archons have over us. All our efforts to counter them on this field are risky, if not unsuccessful. Impossible to match or even compete. They are the masters of the ego, theirs as ours.

This is why all initiations, from Lao Tzu to Castaneda, sing the same antiphon: Cut off your head!   This is not a joke, nor is it an incitement to suicide. There is a good reason for that.

Our brain, the creation of the Archons, is parasitized, bugged to death. They are the ones who put the bugs in the programs that run our brains. Will science one day be able to debunk these programs? I’m afraid the result is worse than before. Science, like everything based solely on reason, is a battlefield from which the archons will always emerge victorious.

Our only asset is the gift that the Goddess has given us. Our supra-consciousness. On this ground the archons cannot venture, beasts as they are. Let’s keep it that way. Our aura is a fortress. It’s also a database where archons don’t have access. Let’s empty our heads, think no more, think no more. Let’s drink from the source of the aura. It’s more powerful than a thousand brains. And infinite.


The seventh degree of awakening

Yet the journey is not over. I see the seventh degree, but I am not there yet. It is the Mat. The Fool who is wiser than the wisest. He who, against all odds, practices controlled madness. Castaneda’s left side implies renouncing the dictatorship of reason. So to leave it to madness. But if we want to avoid asylum, it is important to control ordinary madness. What I do without thinking about it, without seeking it, without forcing me to. It’s done on its own.

I’ve been told by fortune tellers that I’m a Mat by birth. Let the good guys talk. Maybe they’re right, but I don’t believe it. I protect myself behind the best of shields.

Become Mat? Can I one day? Yes, the day I die.


The Tarot of Marseille

As understood and restored my benefactor, the master cartier Jean-Claude Flornoy




Tard Haut

Late High  —  The path of tarot as I followed it step by step, one arcanum after another, in a waltz-hesitation




Without the Source, there would be nothing. But without anything, the Source remains.
Lao Surlam